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1) Autistic people are often late bloomers when it comes to relationships.
Nick Dubin (author of Asperger’s and Anxiety and other self-help books) did not start dating until he was twenty five.
I love hugs and can be very affectionate when I’m in a relationship.
However, if I am experiencing a great deal or stress or anxiety I generally don’t want to be touched or held.
I’ve already encountered this situation with many of my autistic friends, and having that kind of argument with a lover could only be worse.
6) We are very capable of love and affection; sometimes we’re just bad at expressing it.
3) An aversion to touch doesn’t always mean an aversion to sex. I can’t go into too much detail myself as I don’t have a constant aversion to touch.
However, I imagine there are a few downsides to romantic relationships where both parties are on the spectrum.
For example: autistic people often think in black and white terms and can struggle to see things from other people’s perspectives.
Imagine how violent an argument could be between two people who could not see the others perspective!
I was being bullied, and had dealt with that by retreating behind my walls, not expressing affection towards others because I felt it would make me vulnerable. I never stopped loving them; it was just difficult to express that love.
After speaking with some autistic friends I’ve realised this kind of emotional shut down is quite common in times of crisis, particularly when the person in question is a teenager.
There is even a website adults with Asperger’s Syndrome searching for likeminded individuals.