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It is true and pure – you don’t need them to be any certain way.
Heck, you don’t even need them to be your boyfriend or lover. You just love having them in your life and they love being in yours, whether it’s as friends, as lovers, or as life partners.
When you’re fixated on someone, it feels more like you’re suffocating. like you must have them treat you a certain way, give you a certain relationship title, or somehow prove their commitment to you.
You feel like until you have this, you are not OK and will not be OK.
If you’re not listening to the music, you’re not experiencing music.
Yes, I realize I’m speaking in metaphors, so let me tie this up: I don’t care if you of them is not your relationship – it is simply a thought in your head, completely irrelevant to the on-going music of your relationship.
So if the “music” of your relationship is a bitter, hateful ballad of pain and inner suffering… MORE: 5 Signs He’s Not the One When you fixate on a relationship, you are choking the joy out of your own experience and that negative vibe transmits into your relationship and very quickly poisons it, fatally.
You just simply enjoy them as a person and you’re happy with them just being who they are. Again, I have to emphasize that it’s Fixation, on the other hand, does not feel pleasant.
It does not feel good, but it does feel very urgent, very important, and very stressful.
When you’re fixated on someone, your relationship ceases to be about enjoyment and effortlessness.